501. Loveless Motel Easter Parade

 Happy Easter from Loveless Motel!

500. Like a Pendulum Do...with Marmite!

Shown in this photo at home last year in London, sporting his Mr. Popular Trophy and dressing to the left in his Suit Up! pinstripe number, personally fitted by our very own Mr. Billy Swallows of Suit Up! (located off the lobby at Loveless Motel) are "Dickey Loosedore" and his best mate "Bailey Alanski", the names under which they have checked into rooms 222 and adjoining 221, respectively.  Each likes his space - one needs to be prepared for any opportunity to personally welcome any Anglophiles with a craving for fur and the spectacularly uncut.

Given notice, the kitchen staff always stocks up on Marmite for the week for the couple, and places a picture of the Queen on the wall of the little alcove in Birdwhistle's Tearoom favored by our guests and held for them for the duration of the stay.

Suit Up! has remained our guests' little secret source since Mr. Billy's pre-Loveless Hollywood days, when he was in charge of costuming at a major studio and worked with Mr. Alanski on a number of his roles. Since Billy's relocation to our little "wood", London's Carnaby Street has nothing on Loveless Motel, which swings to the left this week, "like a pendulum do." In Tinsel Town, Billy was famed for his little parties, where select gentlemen were invited to stay overnight; Bailey always reckoned that Billy was a favorite American host, and maintained that he was a master at getting men to shed their inhibitions with the suggestion of a little Greek wrestling;  Bailey had been introduced to such exhibitions on more than one occasion. In fact as it turns out, his ability to toss and be tossed around was one factor that bound he and Dickey together for as long as the two tossers could remember.

Welcome back, Dickey and Bailey!

"England swings like a pendulum do..."

499. Friday morning itch - Six old maxims

Where is everyone this morning? Restaurants across Loveless Motel property report virtually no breakfast customers. Must be the Laundry room closure. Where there's smoke, there's fire. What goes up must come down. The bigger they come, the harder they fall. What comes around, goes around. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. If you can't fuck it, beat it.

498. Yesteryear's Queers' Word of the Day #56 - Peacock Palace

Peacock Palace

A men's 

clothing shop 

specializing in 

flamboyant styles

-1960s-

"Have you heard there's a new peacock palace in town that specialized in brocade jock straps? I'm now officially mad about brocade!  You should see the shopkeeper there!  He talked me into one last week.  I'm gonna go down there and see if I can get him to talk me out of it this week"

497. Laundry Room Closure Fallout

The closure of the Laundry Room is having some unintended ripple effects.   Because most men wouldn't be caught dead wearing the same outfit twice on vacation, (not to mention the fact that even if they did, the ripeness of some pants would not be welcome in the dining rooms across property) and because some guests are unwilling/unable to pay the exorbitant cost of having their laundry done for them by Loveless housekeeping, or sending it into town to be dry cleaned, there has been a run on second hand clothing offered at Hard Tack General Store.  Guys are snapping up anything that they can find, whether it fits or not, and regardless of condition.

This, of course, has created a situation which Mr. Billy Swallows at Suit Up has called dreadful, since our inhouse fashion guru says that you should never by anything too small, or you'll end up "looking like a fat whore in an Italian knit" (which he says he once called Elizabeth Taylor in Hollywood to her face during her Eddie Fisher/Richard Burton transition phase, and "What you did to Debbie Reynolds was really shitty, Liz"; he then turned around and walked away from her, slamming the door on her stall, while whistling "Tammy")

Will U. Bonus, Hard Tack manager, has found all of this highly amusing, not to mention lucrative. Not only that, but the tight shorts craze has even necessitated more men being released early from the Hoosegow, directly into the work-release program (which Manager Will oversees), just to handle the mobs of men in the shop pouring themselves into anything three sizes to small .  Come see the collection of "Fallout" gear at Hard Tack General Store: it's cheaper than having your laundry done at Loveless Motel.

496. Loveless Motel can take a hint...

A group of men loitering around the Laundry Room, sucking cock and petting a pussy, have caused a serious accident with a guest who has come in to check on the status of his load. Continual warnings coupled with outright willful defiance of simple rules haven't done the job. The Board, at the suggestion of Nic the senior manager, has decided to close The Laundry Room, and redesign the 8 Ball Bar, prompting its closure as well. Guests will be given the option to have their laundry done by staff when we do our sheets, or have it collected and sent into town for dry cleaning, all at the expense of guests who my be entirely innocent and obey posted rules.  Watch this space for a permanent solution, despite the evidence presented by guests to our establishment that "this is why we just can't have nice things."  In the meantime, remember our motto:  "Safety begins with thee and me". The Hoosegow and the dispensary will be busy tonight.  We have sent an internal memo to all staff members, including Certified Hustlers, reinforcing our belief that pussies get you into all kinds of bad trouble, and we have notified a guest that his cat escaped the Cat Show debacle, though it is still at large, and was last seen running in the direction of the soon-to-open Nutbush Campground.

495. Yes, YOU!

No need to be coy:  it's Monday morning, and we're here to remind you what you did this weekend at Loveless Motel. Don't be surprised that you've been selected as Mr. Popular of the Weekend!  As your prize, you'll be receiving

1. A Nutbush Big Bone dildo prior to its release to our guests - based on the Big Bone that was found during the excavations at soon to open Nutbush Campground

2. A Portfolio of some of our other Mr. Popular winners of the past year

3.  Several Cartons of Marlboro Reds from Blunt Smoke Shop and Lottery Tickets, hand delivered by Dick Blunt himself

4. Two hours with a Certified Hustler of your choice!

5. A private luncheon and  interview in his private quarters with Nic the Senior Manager

 6. A big box of porn magazines, slightly "used" by browsers  at After Midnight Arcade that were deemed "unsalable".

And Best of All, a fucking Trophy, man!  along with a photo session with Snap Wadmacher from Shutter Bug Camera Shop! Congratulations, Mr. Popular!

494. Taking the Gloves off at After Midnight Arcade

Does he or doesn't he? Come meet our peroxide pugilist and find out at After Midnight Arcade, open 24 hours a day, every day off the lobby at Loveless Motel.  As a promotion, Francois will be demonstrating in person and signing autographs with his gloves on.  What else would you like to see him do?  If you wave some poppers under his nose, he'll take off the gloves, put some lube in one, fuck it, cum for you and sell you the glove for 50 bucks.  You can buy him a new set of gloves for 20 bucks if somebody else beats you to the punch.