468. Lake Loveless Polar Bear Club

Traditionally the first snow after Groundhog Day at Loveless Motel, the Polar Bear Club meets for its annual celebration of freezing your ass off in Lake Loveless, because the pursuit of non-stop indiscriminate and anonymous sex just isn't enough for some vacationers at our discreet little paradise. Central to the yearly observance is "Pops" Vielengelt, its original organizer and an Oshkosh, Wisconsin delicatessen owner who remembers the days when Edgar Loveless and Sinjin Birdwhistle entertained at Loveless Lodge. Never without the company of a youthful companion, this year he's treating us to the visage of his twin "nephews" who'll escort him into the frigid lake waters. He says their names are Dan and Don, and whenever he forgets their names, he only needs to sing the bell sounds of Frère Jacques in French ("din, dan, don") to keep himself out of trouble, which also serves as a reminder to him that they are uncut, whenever that happens to come up in conversation.

It's also traditional for Dr. John Long's phone to start ringing off the hook for the next several days as the foolishness of what our "Polar Bears" have done sinks into the heads of some of our more delicate little Pogies, Uranians, Margo Polos and Beach Bitches, necessitating a virtual gangbang of rectal thermometer use and pill-popping in the Doc's office. As if an all out free-for-all Bacchanalian romp after the antediluvian dip would make it all better..

.

466. Ride with Loveless - an excursion into town

Despite the groundhog saying otherwise, and his consequent fate as "Oxtail Soup" on the menu of Birdwhistle's Tearoom, the weather is nice enough this weekend to offer a Sunday excursion to interested men who might want to do some shopping and sightseeing in town.  Less than an hour away, you'll be transported from the bucolic charms of Loveless Motel and its surroundings to the very place you might have wanted to escape in the first place.  Based on past trips, we promise at the very least, some cheap entertainment.  Don't however, stay too long at the ball, as our bus will leave promptly from the drop-off location at precisely 8PM and a hotel room and cab ride back will cost you more than your weeklong stay with us.  We provide here a few pictures of our last Sunday excursion, including the bus driver, some townies, roadside attractions, a few of the fellows who attended, and the bus you wish you were on but won't be.  We recommend bringing along enough cash at a minimum for a late lunch and bail.

451. Ground Hog Day relapse

This weather is something else, and no let-up in sight. All reports say we're in for it for a while.  Loveless Motel guests are holed up, staying warm in their accommodations, from Fireplace Suite motel rooms to Aluminum City trailers. Even truckers are escaping their cabs parked at Loveless Truck Stop and heading for The Bunkhouse. Looks like every method possible, from friction to piling on is being used to turn up the heat. The more bodies, the hotter it gets.  Someone said he'd heard a rumor that the pool was going to be used as an ice skating rink, but as a reminder, Loveless Motel keeps it's pool at a comfortable 80 degrees year round, and that, dear guest, is what the 30 dollar surcharge on your checkout bill will go toward this week.  So better quit whining and start swimming.

On a side note, Loveless Truck Stop Cafe is serving up a rare specialty - Ground Hog Hash.  If you have never tried it, you're in for a real surprise.