504. Loveless Motel v. Uranus Walls, Inc.

Loveless Motel has retained the legal firm, Pounds, Butts, and Bates, LLC, to take action against Uranus Walls, Inc, ("Your solution for an interior that's out of this world"), for the unflattering job they did recently in the reception area of Nic the Senior Manager's new office expansion. Exhibit A, the documentary photograph taken by Shutter Bug Camera Shop photographer Snap Wadmacher of Nic's buddy Irving, who is supervising the landscaping job being completed for the registration area of Nutbush Campground, illustrates Nic's complaint. 

"It's obvious that whoever put this crap up was drunk. I didn't pay for remnants. Nothing matches, and it looks like it was installed with a welding torch. This all needs to be removed. We need to get someone in here who can demonstrate the meaning of well hung." Barristers Pounds and Butts have suggested a loose compensation arrangement, while Bates offers a completely different solution taking a firm hand and a good grip on the situation, milking it for all it's worth and as a result, Nic has said it he feels like he's getting jerked around and screwed, and says he won't stand for it. Irving just rolled his big brown eyes.

393. (Barca) Recliners and Organs (Hammond) and Ethel Smith

In an exciting development, 5 of our suites are now equipped with brand new twin Barca Loungers, and fabulous Hammond Organs! These special accommodations can be booked by calling our waiting phone room staff members, who, as you know, always answer the phone with the musical greeting, "Welcome to Loveless Motel - what are you wearing?".  We've also contracted the services of Ethel "Play the white keys, honey" Smith who will be allegedly entertaining on Saturday afternoons at Tickler's Lounge, coming out of retirement for a 12 week engagement, and can entertain you ensuite for a modest charge in these specially decorated rooms. Ethel wishes all to know that her well-publicized recent shock treatments have done a world of good, and have nearly perfectly restored her hearing loss and balance issues.  All Barca/Hammond suites are situated at least 5 doors away from each other so as not to have situations in which the noise of organs being worked over simultaneously creates unwanted dissonance.

362. When evening shadows fall...

With up to date decorator touches such as burlap window screens (thank you, Loveless Truckstop kitchen staff) and exciting paint colors like Golden Showers, guests are inspired to record their magical moments and have their close encounters captured by an in-house photographer sent over from Shutter Bug Camera Shop, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel.

316. Fireplace Suites at Loveless Motel

 When booking at Loveless Motel, request a Fireplace Suite.  Your new friends will be impressed with your ability to afford such luxury.  Every Fireplace Suite comes with a safe, into which you should place your wallet and keys BEFORE you go about selecting new friends to impress.

277. Aluminum City is for Chess Lovers

When booking your accommodation at Aluminum City at Loveless Motel, our recently acquired trailer court, you can request your favorite decor.  These fellows like to play chess, and requested a knight piece.  Later, they'll be requesting a few props, a model and a camera from Shutter Bug Camera Shop, where knights are out of stock but we have a few Roman Centurion types with big swords.

 

166. Dorothy Draper - as white as the driven snow

Morning sex is the best, especially when your back is resting on a set of Dorothy Draper 600 count Egyptian cotton sheets designed by Mr. Color himself, Carleton Varney. The colorful pattern shown is called "Driven Snow" and can be found in our suites. Mr. Varney's apartment decorator guide can by purchased at Hit and Split, a convenience store located off the lobby

121. Sepia Trio

These slender guys are planning their weekend strategy, beginning with the TGIF Happy Hour down at the Silver Bullet Bar - that out of the way hangout down in the woods at Loveless Motel. Can someone shed a little light on this subject?  They'll be looking for a happy bottom they can share.  Anyone can apply.

74. Latest Decorative Touches

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49. The Jungle Room

 Next time you're with us, ask for the Jungle Room - better yet, call in advance to book this popular room - One of our eager reservationists at Loveless Motel is excited to hear your voice, and he's waiting for your call.  Rates may apply.

10. Conquistador Gold

 All of our rooms have the latest in decor. Our suites are outfitted with luxurious dacron polyester velveteen in popular colors such as Conquistador Gold, shown here. Easy care fabrics make our housekeeping staff happy - if need be, furniture can be hosed down and ready for the next guest within 24 hours.