438. Invitation to the Dance

Even in the dead of winter, the beat goes on and it's raining men at Smarty Pants Disco at Loveless Motel, located off the lobby.  If you need a break, slip through the swinging doors in back of the dance floor and into the lush life that is The Mauve Tavern.  

Of course, if your look isn't up to par in the tavern, you'll be told to get the fuck out.  These bitches are serious!

358. Can't spell "Ferragamo" - no Mauve Tavern for you!

Our handsome, mature guest Carter recently heard a knock at his door, and when he opened it, no one was there, but this note was taped to it: 

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Carter, but in reviewing your recent answers during your interview, the group feels that you are not quite the right fit for our gatherings at the Mauve Tavern. We hope you'll enjoy some of the other options here at Loveless Motel, such as Ticklers Lounge, and there is a contingent of our members who are hoping to bump into you at the Silver Bullet Bar."

355. I spy with my little eye - Fresh Fruit at the Mauve Tavern

You've just walked into the Mauve Tavern for the first time at 

Smarty Pants Disco at Loveless Motel.

Once you answer these questions satisfactorily, 

we'll review a few expectations with you and you will be contacted.

"Who are your people?"

"Where did you go to school?"

"What is your profession?"

"Who's your favorite designer?"

"Who is Maria Callas?"

"What is your shoe size?"

"Spell Ferragamo"

64. Woops - Wrong Room...

A group of The Mauve Tavern Happy Hour guests staying in the Suites wing of Loveless Motel have just noticed that a group of men staying at the Bunkhouse have just arrived, and will be redirecting them to the beer bust.  Looks like Judgment Day has arrived too...

25. Happy Hour at the Mauve Tavern in Smarty Pants Disco

At Loveless Motel, Smarty Pants Disco, located off the lobby, has a back bar called The Mauve Tavern. Through two swinging doors, you'll be surrounded by lots of gold-framed antique mirrors on a deep purple velveteen wall fabric, the glow of soft pink diffused lighting, with long gold speckled vinyl banquettes, tiny tables for two, and deep orange shag carpet throughout, accessed along a 40 foot meat rack standing-only bar- a runway of sorts.  Our Happy Hour hideaway is just the ticket, especially on Friday nights, when it's the kickoff to the weekend. It's strictly cruise, often transactional. Barter and trade, buy and sell. Many locals attend, their eyes fixed on who walks through the door. Can you say "judgmental" and "heavy cruise?"  Don't be intimidated. It's just their quaint style.  The Bobbsey Twins are all grown up now.