538. Dirty Pool Crew Takes a Break

 

Dirty Pool construction crew best pals take a break.  The remodeling, headed by Project Manager Rock Blockhead, is nearing completion and promises to fulfill the needs of those who need to get a load done, and have a brew and shoot a friendly game of pool while they wait for their laundry cycles to complete. The Vagabond Bar over at Aluminum City is currently the happening place for all who want to rack a set of balls, since the demolition of the 8 Ball Bar and Laundry Room. 

509. Uncle Joe's First Clue

 

Jack Leyendecker, talent scout for Loveless Motel's intern program, made a trip to Tuba City, Arizona on a tip he received from an old friend that there was a cluster of young men there who showed promise and he might be able to fill half his quota in one stop. These fellows were all enrolled at the local community college voc/tech school, all had been members of the same basket ball team in high school, and continued their gamesmanship in weekend get togethers at a local  desert ranch under the guiding hand of the auto mechanic instructor there.  The end of the term and their training completed, Jack conducted interviews and convinced eight of them to come to Loveless Motel as interns, with the opportunity to have practical experience in the Motor Pool, and learn a bit about the hospitality industry, to boot.

Naturally the men congregated together, and even stayed in one small dorm in the Bunkhouse where they interacted with some of the guests, attended classes, but kept largely to themselves.  Talk soon began among the other members of the class that the Arizona lads had some interesting, nay, weird fucking notions.  Uncle Joe, Loveless Motel's chief classroom facilitator and disciplinarian, had encountered them hunched around a beach ball one afternoon during a class break, and learned they had never seen one before except in Annette Funicello movies, since they'd all grown up in the desert. Seemingly amazed by the sight of it, they rolled, poked and prodded the ball around the pool deck, and Joe opened the conversation with them as he approached the group by saying "Have you ever seen the movie "The Dictator", where Hitler bounces a beach ball Earth off his ass?"  

And from out of nowhere, one of the beach ball gazers says "The Earth ain't round - it's flat".  The other guys laughed, and one chimed in "He's a nut job, don't mind him, Uncle Joe.  We all know the earth ain't flat."  and then out of the same mouth "same as we all know Ike was a commie, just like we learned in Automatic Transmission Class".  Uncle Joe replied "Looks like the John Birch Society is alive and well in Tuba City!" to which the kid says "How'd you know?"

Fuck fuck fuck. Joe thought to himself...and I have to take these guys camping.  "Okay guys, let's get showered and then it's back to class."

484. Upcoming - First Annual Loveless Motel Cat Show

 

Loveless Motel's First Annual Cat Show is fast approaching, and guests have sent in photos of themselves and their entries. "Snap" Wadmacher of Shutter Bug Camera Shop will be photographing the event with his best feline buddy, Litterace', the piano playing wonder cat, who also doubles as Snap's assistant, whenever a smile is required from a subject. "Snap" received the cat as a gift some time ago from a grateful guest Lee, for services rendered, who faithful readers may remember filled in for Paul at Ticklers Lounge after the waffle iron incident.  The exhibition will be held in the Footlight Fairies Cabaret venue, located off the lobby, which will be transformed into a small auditorium for the event.  Excitement is building as word gets around about the names of several high profile previous guests who have told us they can't wait to flaunt their pussies in front of an audience.

 

Guests entering the contest will be housed in a section of units in Aluminum City along Tin Can Alley, where several units have had carpet removed and tile laid down.  The park-like setting of the area is perfect for exercising your pussy, night or day.

A frequent guest, a well-known exhibitionist and practical joker has sent a photo of his "entry", but Nic the senior manager has called him, and good-naturedly thanked him for his effort, and to say that we recognize that his pussy has been photoshopped in -  nice try. Nic told him that he is "open" to another kind of "entry" and asked Psycho Randy to hold all his calls for 20 minutes.

469. Coming out of hibernation at Loveless Motel

 

After Midnight Arcade has the newest issue of the Advocate available - just ask for the latest February issue, and while there, pick up a few back issues! Right now you can get the July 1979 issue at half off and entertain yourself with George Mazzei's article "Who's Who in the Zoo" with great illustrations by Advocate cartoonist Gerard Donelon, whose work we excerpt here. We've seen a few of these burly, furry creatures here latel and a few were observed skinny dipping recently - a misapplied name for an activity which doesn't quite cover these men, literally or figuratively speaking. It appears they would make a downright acceptable solution to those cold nights we've been having. Looks like we have a winner in the "Give me another gay label" contest. Bear meat, anybody?

465. Snap Wadmacher Jackpot - Mr. Dick Gee's Brother

 

Mr. Dick Gee, Loveless Motel's resident hair burner, of Mr. Dick Gee's Hair and Now, (located off the lobby) informs us that his brother stayed briefly last week at the invitation of Snap Wadmacher, roving photographer of Shutter Bug Camera Shop.  Dick had shared that his brother, Mr. Solo Generosamente, needed two things during his visit: a haircut and a professional photo session to have a series of pictures available for placing an ad in a lonely hearts publication in his home city.  The resemblance is uncanny between Dick and his sibling; they certainly have the same hair - and as for other attributes, Dick tells us that his own moniker is a sobriquet - and quite a "handle" it is, so we hear.

  Snap has loaned a few pics for us to publish, with the permission of Solo, who has also agreed to his insertion into a souvenir calendar at an as yet unannounced date.  Solo had remained holed up in his room during his stay, only seeing Dick and Snap, and asked that the calendar not be published until he had left Loveless Motel. Asked why Dick thought Solo even needed to advertise, he said his brother has trouble fitting in and he just wants guys to know what they're in for in advance.  In other news, Snap Wadmacher informs us he is taking the week off, and will be recuperating from a recent physically taxing ordeal, while mostly in a standing position.

Snap Wadmacher - Still Standing

456. Aluminum City Celebrates Chinese New Year!

In honor of Chinese New Year, some of the units in Aluminum City have been upgraded with new red carpeting and a stunning Chinoiserie hand carved rosewood chair with dragon handles; a souvenir teal colored enameled floor ash tray will be offered as a gift to the first 20 lodgers to book the units.  These same units have had their wall paneling re-lacquered in a durable lead-based formula and an exciting shade created specifically for Loveless Motel called "Monkey Jungle Taupe." 

In an alarming effort to offer an experience consistent with the theming of our little Aluminum City hutong, "Forbidden (Fruit) City",  an "edict" from Nic, the senior manager will  be handed to any qualifying lodgers via an unexpected knock on the unit door, dictating that men staying in these units must either have fully developed facial hair, or be clean shaven - nothing in-between, and therefore will have to have their nascent facial hair forcibly removed in a sudden visit from Dick Gee, our resident stylist and proprietor of Mr. Dick Gee's Hair and Now, located off the lobby.  Tickets to these surprise pop-up events can be purchased by interested onlookers at the front desk 30 minutes prior to each "home invasion" with all ticket-holding participant-voyeurs being asked to play the part of "angry villagers"

421. Laundry Room freeze fiasco forces plumbing face feeding frenzy

In a surprise overnight freeze in normally temperate January at Loveless Motel, the pipes in the poorly insulated laundry room have burst, and one of the washers froze mid-cycle, loaded with jockstraps and denim. As a result, management is taking bids for the job in a one-day frenzy of interviews. May the best plumber win!

As an aside, the collector whose jocks were frozen admits to a confidant that instead of his disco outfit, he mistakenly put his entire piss-and-cum-stained haul into the wash, thereby ruining the intrinsic value of the collection, rendering it worthless as sniff-bate material. He relates that he had spent days raiding the locker room of the Bunkhouse and had some prize specimens that were still damp from recently ejaculated spooge and drip. "But I look on the bright side," he said; "I'm here for another week, and as long as I don't get caught there's plenty more where they came from"

392 Meanwhile, in other news...Paisley!

Packaged Goods!, your source for undergear, located off the Lobby at Loveless Motel, announces its recent acquisition of a warehouse full of paisley print longer length boxer shorts, ensuring the establishment will be able to offer these hopefully popular items for many seasons to come.  These all -rayon practical articles are guaranteed to cause a stir, nay, mockery, where-ever and whenever they are worn.  Don't try this in public.

389. Lobby Christmas Tree becomes Popular Photo Op

After the debacle of the drunken Christmas Card scandal, it seems the word has gotten out at Loveless Motel, and guests are requesting pictures of themselves posing in front of the tree in the lobby. Photo sessions are allowed only  between the hours of 3 AM and 5 AM when the exterior lobby doors are locked.  "Snap" Wadmacher, ace inhouse photographer at Shutterbug Camera Shop says his index finger is sore from all the extra action it's been seeing lately.  Here's and example of the result: Calvin is currently staying in room 222 and has offered to provide "Snap" with something else to do with his finger.

382. Toys for Boys demonstrations this weekend!

Stop over to Toys for Boys, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel, for a demonstration of the newest item in our toybox, "The Intruder".  Every purchase comes with a jar of lube and a smile. You may choose to be the subject or the object of the demonstration. Absolutely no refunds.

381.Hit and Split for provisions

For those guests in units with kitchens or kitchenettes, upon arrival stop by Hit and Split, the convenience store located off the lobby at Loveless Motel.  You'll find most popular staples here, at prices calculated to keep us in business for a long time.  Enjoy your stay! This guest has apparently not read the resort rules. In his haste to stock up for his stay on the very first day, he has jumped the gun.  Hit and Split is one of the few places at Loveless where nudity is not allowed.  Hopefully he doesn't get caught, but our clerk, Frank Lee Famischtaggen seems not to mind, and can we really blame him? Yes - we can.