517. Three things for interns to to remember

Uncle Joe always inserts into his lectures during his intern classes at Loveless Motel "Three things to remember" and teaches this module as a class participation activity, and asks this particular class of nine men to form  3 groups of three by counting off "1,2 or 3" "I'm going to assign each group one thing to remember, and it's your task to illustrate to the class what each thing means and an easy way to remember it.  "Snap" Wadmacher will take a photo of each group showing us your interpretation. Here's the list! "

Okay number ones - here's your theme:

1. Always wear clean underwear, in the event you need to go the hospital unexpectedly, so that you don't bring shame on your family.

Number twos - show us this:

2.  A little brush with olive oil makes for a tasty crust on your buns.

And finally, number threes - 

3. Don't fill your plate too hastily.  In this house, we always make sure there's enough to go around for everybody to eat.

"Yes, Mother Joe"

512. Lifeguard Try-outs open soon!

 

Loveless Motel is gearing up for a wet and wild season by interviewing for Lifeguard positions for both Lake Loveless and our pool. Aspirants should join other interested men at the old hangar located in the Motor Pool area for a whistle blowing demonstration to be held soon, followed by a lecture on best blowing practices, recognizing situations in which blowing is the best course of action, and how to recover from an unsuccessful blow.

 You may bring your own whistle (please, no slide whistles or kazoos) or you may purchase a plastic souvenir gag whistle at a nominal cost, from the remaining stock of those offered at last year's popular Lunch and Learn lecture in the Grab-Basket Conference Room, "The the subtle differences between sucking and blowing" Whistles are randomly incised with either "Blow me at the Loveless Motel pool" or "I got blown at Loveless Motel" or "I got thrown out of the Loveless Motel Pool for blowing this whistle"

494. Taking the Gloves off at After Midnight Arcade

Does he or doesn't he? Come meet our peroxide pugilist and find out at After Midnight Arcade, open 24 hours a day, every day off the lobby at Loveless Motel.  As a promotion, Francois will be demonstrating in person and signing autographs with his gloves on.  What else would you like to see him do?  If you wave some poppers under his nose, he'll take off the gloves, put some lube in one, fuck it, cum for you and sell you the glove for 50 bucks.  You can buy him a new set of gloves for 20 bucks if somebody else beats you to the punch. 

 

492. Ticklers Lounge After Hours

Ticklers Lounge at Loveless Motel, located off the lobby, has a pretty strict dress code: coat and tie, and if you aren't wearing a coat, they have a few in the back they will loan you for an evening.  Invariably, after a sultry evening of showtunes and pop laden with testosterone and queerness, like "My Boy Bill", "Mad About the Boy", "Secret Love", "We Kiss in a Shadow", and even "YMCA", sung in 12 part harmony around a piano that smells like scotch spilled on tweed and pinstriped wool, with a smoke chaser, it becomes more than a man can take and after last call and so the doors are locked for the few who want to remain behind.  Though the suits stay on, the zippers come down. Some of these guys have been brought here by their employers as part of an extended interview process. "Are you able to speak in front of an audience?  Are you outgoing - a bit of an extrovert? Do you enjoy showing gratitude in public?" These are questions a candidate for employment might well be asked, and should be prepared to demonstrate. Suits rule the economy, the social structure and stratosphere, and sexual hierarchy. Yes, cowboys and leathermen, you can only come in if you're on your knees and you put on that jacket.

470. Yesteryear's Queers' Word of the Day #53 - Bear

Bear

A large and/or

hairy gay man

-1980s-

In 1979 Advocate published a satirical article by writer George Mazzei, entitled "Who's Who in the Zoo" which assigned, via the illustrations of cartoonist Gerald Donelan, animal bodies to several types of gay men, including bears, owls, cats, dogs, marmosets and swans. 

Not long thereafter, in 1987 Richard Bulger and Chris Nelson founded Bear Magazine which included models which fit the physical description.  Jack Radcliffe was an early model who epitomized the ideal "muscle bear" with a full and solid hairy body and handsome bearded face.

460. You'll have to drag me out of here! - Monday Motivational

 

It's raining - it's Monday.  He had a little too much to drink and stayed up late - Who the fuck wants to work?  Psycho Randy gets a call at the front desk from one of the Birdwhistle Tearoom waiters who says he's feeling poorly, and Randy knows better - its the same kid he saw peering through a gloryhole at him over at the Bunkhouse at 1AM this morning.  Randy was just there to take a piss, and ignored the kid, but Birdwhistle Tearoom patrons aren't gonna ignore the fact that he's MIA , when they're told they're waiting on the waiter!  Not on his watch!  He pops his head into Nic's office saying he needs coverage and why, and Nic says "Go give the little fucker some motivation to get his ass to work!" Randy's gonna march right over to the kid's room and give him a piece of his mind, and a bit of ... motivation ... with the back of his hand, and "get his ass to work" before he even walks out of his room.  Knock Knock - who's there? - The kid? "All's well that ends well" His plan to have a little Randy in morning worked well.

443. Nationwide Manhunt Successful - new House Dick hired

Loveless Motel is happy to announce that we have filled our House Detective position. Harrison Biggerstaff (just Harry to you) checked all the right boxes on his application and will enhance our compliance team greatly. "Drilling down to the core of the matter, I always get my man" said Harry in his interview.  Just so you know, he's unspoken for, and in his free time, collects antique porcelain, loves sports, and calls himself "a bit of a fashion whore".   He's eager to get to work by going undercover to catch that jockstrap thief for starters. The head of our personnel department vouches for Harry's skills. "He knows how to get to the root of the matter."

424. Will U. Bonus joins Loveless Motel Staff

 

A frequent guest of Loveless Motel for many years, Mr. Will U. Bonus has agreed to enter into a contractual arrangement with the firm as Manager of Hard Tack General Store, the second hand cowboy and leather boutique adjacent to the Bunkhouse. In his capacity as manager of that facility, he'll also take on the task of wrangling the work-release program, mentoring men who have been contingently released from the Hoosegow in order to repay their debt to Loveless Motel. Will's credentials include nearly making it through Wharton's School of the University of Pennsylvania, and having been the accountant of a moderately sized used furniture store which released him from its staff due to an unjustified accusation of mishandling estate sales, in particular those of elderly widowed men with sizable endowments (in the bank). "I just love the get and give of mentorship," says Will, after a week on the job. The Management of Loveless Motel congratulates Mr. Bonus on his appointment.

413. Footlight Fairies Cabaret NYE Dance Rehearsals

New Years Eve promises to be an event long remembered this year at Footlight Fairies Cabaret, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel. Chorus boys in rehearsal are working hard, perfecting challenging moves such as full splits, often requiring the assistance of more than one man for those dancers who've not been limbered up in a while. Plunging to the floor suddenly from a full standing position onto an unyielding, rock hard surface can really separate the novice from the professional, and practice is key to being able to give a tightly choreographed exhibition, stretching the limits of even the most accomplished performer.

397. Weren't you at Birdwhistle's Tearoom last night?

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