376. Can't wait to get to Loveless Motel!

Literally, these guys just can't wait to get to Loveless. The whole point of the trip was privacy, a pool, sauna, new friends, new experiences, but it looks like car head is inevitable, and that 2 night room guarantee deposit is non-refundable. Fuel is not cheap this year at 65 cents a gallon. And deposits, as it turns out, cum in all kinds of flavors.

375. Yesteryear's Queers' Word of the day #42 - Carwash

 

Carwash

Doing it in a car

because neither party

has a better place

to go for sex

-1960s-

"Backseat Betty's tricks drive him to an alley three blocks from the bar for a quick carwash, and then comes back to the bar and spends the cash he made on more beer. It's a real racket - wash, rinse, repeat."

374. Motor Pool Jacks

Guests making their way over to the Motor Pool at Loveless Motel will find that the garage closes down at 7PM and is dedicated to an alcohol-free play zone, under the supervision of the Head Mechanic and chief hose handler, "Sparky" McMasterson.  Admission is free, and Sparky says no one leaves without being glad he came.

373. Footlight Fairies Cabaret Fab Four

Our Footlight Fairies Cabaret inhouse band, The Fab Four, are shown here in a practice session in the sub-basement of the Bunkhouse (also known as The Tubs). These guys can make all the racket they want down there, and have an agreement with the manager to whom they have made a promise that no one will get shocked, with only a slight fear that the humidity from the indoor waterfall might cause an electric shock. The band reports "so far so good" and has gained a number of fans who are regular patrons of The Tubs. "The Fab Four" can be seen every weekend at the Footlight Fairies Cabaret, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel

372. Menu item additions at Loveless Truckstop Cafe'

At Loveless Truckstop Cafe', one of the waiters' favorite welcome line as he seats guests is "Coffee, Tea or me?" It's pretty much a smackdown challenge, especially when "me" is the choice. We'll have "me" for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, please! And put a head on it! This technique has been so popular that a new menu item has been added, and you can get the same dish if you order the Spit-roast Spring Chicken.

 

371. How do you like your meat?

At Loveless Truckstop Cafe', customer satisfaction is king.  Whether you have wandered over to the cafe' from Loveless Motel or from Aluminum City Trailer Court, or just pulled into the parking lot with your big rig, getting your order quickly and just the way you like it is the goal.  How do you like your meat?

370. Menacing man with axe seen stalking the woods

It's that time of year again, when a couple of our butchest staff members get handed sharp tools to go out and terrorize the woodland creatures - (read "our cruising guests".) We're getting calls regarding occasional sightings of wild-eyed strangers around the Stables and Silver Bullet bar area bearing axes, which has set quite a few of our first time guests on edge. Our notice should have gone out earlier - our randy colleagues have been out looking for 2 Christmas trees - one for the lobby and one to erect poolside. At least, that's what the front desk has been telling callers. You're welcome to offer to help lighten their load.

369. A Bunkhouse workout with consequences

A few presses and the view at the gym over at the Bunkhouse proves just too irresistible.  Men will be men at Loveless Motel.

368. Safety First at Loveless Motel

The management at Loveless Motel reminds all guests that safety is a priority.  Standing on slippery enamel is a dangerous act, and at the very least, one should grab hold of a nearby well-anchored object, like the head of a seated partner.  While the aesthetics of this scene are doubtless appealing, the undeniable safety hazard is as plain as the appendage in your face.

367. Reminder - Christmas Tree going up in the lobby tonight!

 

Guests at Loveless Motel are invited annually to decorate their room doors and may purchase various holiday decor, including popular Christmas trees and decorative balls at Hit and Split, our convenience store located off the lobby.  Too busy to decorate it yourself?  Hire one of our staff members to attend to your specific requests.

366. Yesteryear's Queers' Word of the Day #41 - Gorilla Salad

Gorilla Salad

Thick, dark,

hairy pubes

-1960s-

"I like the guy, but ever time we're together, I spend 2 days with a toothpick getting out all that gorilla salad stuck in my teeth"

365. Washable Naugahyde furnishings at Aluminum City

 Popular Aluminum City trailer homes at Loveless Motel include contemporary Naugahyde furnishings which are easily wiped off, reducing the chance of additional cleaning charges that may be levied after your stay.  So feel free to let yourself go in these units, though we advise against getting anything on the highly absorbent wood paneling in many of our tin can units.

364. Adjectives are a man's best friend

Adjectives are a man's best friend. When it comes to personal fashion, look no further than Packaged Goods!, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel.  Carrying a full stock of intimate wear from jockstraps to trusses, in a place where it's hard to tell who wants to do what to whom, these fashion pullovers will leave no doubt about who's boss at Smarty Pants Disco.

363. Loveless Motel v. Fawlty Construction LLC

Recent renovations have gone awry.  Local contractors DBA Fawlty Construction Co.  Was tasked with adding on to one of the stand alone units in the motor court section of Loveless Motel, and as demonstrated by some of our office personnel in a photograph taken as proof in court and marked "Exhibit A", a wall has collapsed, rendering the unit unrentable.  Our solicitors in town, Law firm known as Dewey, Cheatham and Howe, have filed a suit on our behalf. We expect a swift judgement, plus court costs.

362. When evening shadows fall...

With up to date decorator touches such as burlap window screens (thank you, Loveless Truckstop kitchen staff) and exciting paint colors like Golden Showers, guests are inspired to record their magical moments and have their close encounters captured by an in-house photographer sent over from Shutter Bug Camera Shop, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel.

361. Relatively speaking, who's your daddy?

The front desk staff suspects that these two men, who checked in together as Mr. Jones and Mr. Smith actually share the name Mr. Smith. Your secret's ours, and Loveless Motel guarantees confidentiality. But we gotta say, just before our housekeeping guy knocks and can distinctly hear "Take it, Daddy!" 4 times in less than 10 seconds, and hears the slapping sound of the family jewels against bare skin, that nobody's gonna yell uncle. But they might still need towels.

360. Blunt Smoke Shop for his 21st Birthday

 Two brothers from Michigan have booked into Loveless Motel to celebrate a 21st Birthday Party.  The Birthday Man, Harry Geldmacher, seen here on the left at Blunt's Smoke Shop and Lottery Tickets, is shown here with big brother Frank.  It's Harry's first time to an all-male resort, and Frank has promised a few birthday surprises.  They're heading over to the stables for a horse ride this afternoon.  Dick Blunt told Frank "no charge" for the pack of Camels, and threw in a lottery ticket and a couple of 'gars, and a pack of Beechnut chewing tobacco. "You'll need this over at the stables," he said, "and it's always a good thing to offer a cowboy a chaw"

359. 8 Ball Bar "After Hours"

Last call at the 8 Ball Bar at Loveless Motel doesn't necessarily mean it's time to go back to your room.  Sometimes we just lock the doors and ask a select few to stick around.

 

358. Can't spell "Ferragamo" - no Mauve Tavern for you!

Our handsome, mature guest Carter recently heard a knock at his door, and when he opened it, no one was there, but this note was taped to it: 

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Carter, but in reviewing your recent answers during your interview, the group feels that you are not quite the right fit for our gatherings at the Mauve Tavern. We hope you'll enjoy some of the other options here at Loveless Motel, such as Ticklers Lounge, and there is a contingent of our members who are hoping to bump into you at the Silver Bullet Bar."

357. Express yourself at Shutter Bug Camera Shop

Shutter Bug Camera Shop, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel, is the perfect place to bring your creative ideas to fruition. Book a photo suite and private photographer today! It's our pleasure to assist and offer suggestions for a successful shoot. Sometimes creativity is nothing more than recognizing the low hanging fruit of ideas and capitalizing on them. Our private photographers are experts in recognizing and handling every opportunity that might present itself.